Long distance love

Sometimes I feel weird when I say our relationship/love/marriage is long distance, because some people probably wouldn't agree with that. My husband isn't in the army, he isn't overseas for work, he isn't even out of the state for work. To me, long distance means we aren't physically together. There was a time when long distance did mean states upon states apart, opposite sides of the states in fact. But now I am lucky enough that I have a "weekend husband," if that's what you want to call him. It's so funny. As I write this post I am actually nervous, which isn't normal for me when I blog.

The last thing I would want is my husband to be offended when I call him any of these terms. And I don't want to come off as "needy" or "clingy" or... I don't even know! I just don't want my sarcasm or dry humor to come off in a negative way when I'm talking about something so important. So bare with me! 

When people ask me, "how do you do it," "how can you stand it," "doesn't it bother you," I normally am unsure how to answer. My first answer is normally on the humorous side, "this ain't our first rodeo," but then the answer always comes to it flat out sucks. I won't lie, I'd love having a husband home on the dot at 5:15 pm every night. To get to watch tv together and fall asleep together, sure it'd be nice. But there's something called reality that we've coped with pretty well. 

The first time I met E, he left for his internship, in Ohio, less then 48 hours later. How rude!

But, we both strongly felt the whole "love at first sight" cliche, and were going to do anything to keep in touch.  We were going to be apart for 3 months. So with the wonders of technology, we talked a few times a week on the phone, and texted as much as teenage girls. Thank gosh for unlimited texting plans! Once E came back from New York, and Ohio, he had to finish his senior year of college. An hour away. And as I was working a 9-5 job, as well as in the midst of transiting careers and going back to school, it turned into a "weekend relationship." I say that in the sense that those were the main times we saw each other. If he had off school, or it was a special occasion, one of us would drive to see the other. It was something we just did. There was never any second thought about it.

Come graduation, E accepted a job with the company he had interned with the summer we met. Which meant I went from having a "weekend boyfriend," to a "once a month boyfriend." Ugh.

E came home every three weeks, and luckily his company gave him off extended time over the Christmas holidays. Those weekends were crazy packed trying to see his family, my family, each other. And his traveling sometimes sucked to say the least. His flight wouldn't get in until midnight on a Friday, and leave about 3 on a Sunday. Talk about no time together. Where he was based made it more difficult too. If he was in Pennsylvania or Colorado, with the time difference, that made it hard for us to even get to talk more then 30 minutes a night. 

There was a little stipulation when it came to the distance, and that was it had to change between the engagement and wedding. And two months after we got engaged, it did. E left his company and within a month, with the Lord on our side, he got a job based in Wisconsin. We knew there was still traveling involved, he had to drive almost 3 hours a day going to and from my place. But he also had an "office," where he would be based out of. That made it super easy for us to find our own place. However, I am realistic and know that these jobs he works on only take so many months to finish. So when the job is done, he's off to another one. And that job ended just before Christmas. Since the first of the year, he has been working 2 and a half hours north of here. He leaves at 3:30 in the morning on Monday, and most nights get home about 7 on Fridays. Our Sunday nights are spent having dinner, watching tv in bed, and falling asleep between 7:30 and 8. Yipee!  sarcasm.

This job will last until May, and then I can finally have my husband back! For awhile. We never know where he will be next so he could easily be a few hours away, again.

What do I do during the week?
Sometimes I pack up chunk and we head to my mom's for a few nights. Chunk sure loves dem kittens.

If I stay here?
Well, to start with, I don't sleep. Too many "anxieties" go through my head [that's the grown up word, right?], and so I normally leave a few lights on, and curl in bed with the TV blaring and the bedroom lights on full blast. I either find a movie or two, or I'll find a new TV series to start watching....and then watch almost all the episodes.

Bedtime? What's that. It's normally whenever my eyes can't stay open anymore, 3am or later. But believe me when I say, that sleeping in thing doesn't happen either. Some days I get the 6am phone call to sub, and that means I need multiple rockstars to get through the day, and others chunk wants me up by first tweet of the birds. Sleeping in? Doesn't happen. Naps? Sometimes those happen. But they're cat naps, 30 minutes max.

So, in short. The long distance sucks. But we find it a fight worth fighting. And we're use to it. And sometimes, I don't mind it. I can make my Target stops, or Marshalls stops and not be asked "did you really need that?" Or not have to make dinner. And eat what I want for a few days.

But the best part? We miss each other more then you can imagine. It makes our time with each other that much more special, and that much more important. We have to get any issues worked out immediately as we only have a short amount of time with each other. Pissed about something? Have to talk it out. Errands to run? Get them out of the way to spend time doing what we want. The kisses are sweeter, the hugs are longer, the cuddles mean that much more.  I wouldn't trade places with anyone.