Water under the bridge

There's this thing about growing up. That even as we get older, there is one thing that never gets better. Loss.

Loss of a friendship. Loss of a relationship. Loss of a job. Loss of a loved one. Loss of a friend.

As we grow up, it's inevitable that we are going to change. Our surroundings will change, our hobbies, our social life, our friends. "Shit happens." A falling out, a change of location, a stupid fight... these things change our priorities over the years and end up, ultimately, shaping us to who we are.

At some point, the fights, the disagreements, the moving away, all needs to become water under the bridge. When the years have passed, but the memories haven't faded, it gets very lonely sharing those memories with people who weren't there. With people who don't know the person you're talking about, the location the memory happened at, or don't get why it was "so funny."

Last week, a college friend of mine passed away. He was the life of the party, no matter where we went. Always a smile on his face, and making others smile as well. I can say for about 2 years, he was a very important part of my life in college. He helped make that big college adjustment easier, helped bring me out of my shell, and always found the positive when I had something to vent about.

But then time passed, and groups of friends changed and he wasn't someone I spent almost all week with anymore. But I found myself wondering, does that make my memories any less relevant then people he was currently close with? Does that make his passing any less saddening for me? And then answer to that, is no.

Most of my memories with him include one of my best girlfriends, and we still talk about those nights with our "guys" when we're together like they were yesterday. When we look though the pictures, we can't help but giggle.

Death is not a fun part of growing up. When you fantasized about being an "adult," as a kid, nobody warned you these are the things that you will have to experience.

Life, as cliche as it is, is short. If there's a friend you fell out of touch with, get ahold of them. If you need to apologize for a falling out, say "I'm sorry." Enjoy the time you do have with each other and always cherish the memories. After all, isn't that what life is for? Making memories with memorable people.

RIP Cody.